While I digest from eating way too much KFC fried chicken, I'll type here, I guess. WELP! I went back to my old job. I feel like a failure but at least I feel like I have more direction in life, once again. Maybe that time off was meant for me to "get my shit together". Let's just hope that I really am cut out to be a Foreign Service Officer and it'll lead me to a cool bustling city in East Asia or South East Asia. My test date is slowly getting closer and closer. I've been studying on my cardio days rather than reading comic books, but I get kind of bored after 20 minutes and take breaks in between my cycling.
I've also been trying to keep myself more in check by setting a time to wake up to every single day (including weekends). I'm thinking that maybe that way, I can still take naps without disrupting my actual sleep time too much. Other than that, nothing has really happened this week. It legit rained around here for two days and I got my online orders from the week prior.
Contrary to what I thought, the flock of resolutioners heading to the gym wasn't that huge? I'm not sure if it's because I'm just so use to going at the "dead" time or it's because there are three big name gyms competing for business in the area now, so people are more sprawled. Either way, I try to get home before 3AM and sleep before 5AM. I'm the worst and most nocturnal piece of trash to exist.
That's all.
Oh! My dog woke up with teary and swollen eyes again. I feel like his pink eye is very periodic which makes me wonder how guide dogs are taken care of? since they are known to be relatively healthy and all. As a pet parent, I feel horrible because all I can do is wipe his eyes with salt water solution and hug him, but he's a trooper and I've never really had any other problems like worms or anything.
I already typed an entry, so I don't know what to put in here now. 5 minutes until the new year here! I wish every person reading this the best for 2016!
-Peter
You know that feeling when you feel great about how you look in the mirror and then, you see yourself on video and cringe. The camera adds ten pounds, they say. I'm owning up to it though. I've trained so hard this past year. I only skipped one day of gym because I was so dead tired from Disneyland that I actually knocked out in the car (that never happens). Any other day that I couldn't go to the gym was because it was a holiday, which is basically around this month. I can't gym until tomorrow, so I have 2 extra hours of time to kill. I've been trying to finish up my FSOT study guide, in case I start working again real soon. So much US culture, history, laws, government, world geography, math, and managerial things to brush up on. On one hand, I like doing this because I get to learn or relearn stuff I liked to take classes in when I was in college. On the other hand, my hands are freezing and I can't write nicely because of it. My eyes also start to get tired and dry from reading and I just want to crawl into my bed and try to finish up Plants v. Zombies 2 on my phone....
When the 2nd of February draws near, you'll know when I'm flipping the fuck out because I'll vlog about it, possibly eating dinner in tears after completing my test. I don't know. In other news, I found out that SNOW got more stickers and this Sailor Moon wannabe one is especially amusing, so I had genius idea of getting my dog to be in it LOL.
I had Popeye's this Christmas Day. My mom didn't feel like cooking so she asked if my brother or I could go see if KFC or Popeye's was open on Christmas. I'm kind of surprised it was, to be honest, but it is a great opportunity for a business to make money due to fact that every other business is closed.
I guess I'll be on the hunt for more seasonal things now. That probably also means that I should be observing fast food chains more too. Christmas is coming up, ugh. I don't really care for it since I don't really receive or give presents. Weather forecasts says this week will be absurdly cold, so I'll be bracing for that. I've yet to wear my thermal leggings this year.
In a couple of days, I'm going to ask my old boss if I can get back to working at the learning center again because I'd rather work part-time at a job I don't hate than full-time at job I dread going to every day. It absolutely drives me nuts that it feels like the only thing my mom ever talks about is making money. I'm literally at that point where just killing myself seems like a viable option because what's the point of living, really? To just make money? Do I exist just so I can give MY MOM money? Did my mom give birth to me with expectations that all I am is some form of subsistence to her?
It's funny because whenever I mention that I would just kill myself if nothing turns out right, she'd say "why do you say stuff like that?". Well, mom, do you have any other reason why I should be alive? It's not like my existence is that significant. I have no real obligations nor do I owe anything. Sure, my closest friends will be devastated, but they'll move on. Apparently, I'm already a failure to you and all I'm seen as is some extra form income. Nothing is really stopping me from saying, "Thanks for raising me and allowing me to learn so much about life and myself. I think I'm done here, bye". Obviously, I'm smarter than to just give up so easily but when it starts to seem like a reasonable option, it gets pretty real. I also know that helping my parents is something I SHOULD be doing, but when all I hear is job this, pay for that, and not acknowledging that I'm trying my best, I can't help but feel bitter at the idea.
Well anyway, last week, I did get asked to set up an interview for a job at some tech marketing company but it's located in Manhattan Beach, so I would waste my life in at least 2 hours of traffic everyday. After consulting with my friend, I decided to not go forward with it. I didn't even expect to get a reply, anyway. It was just for fucks.
Consequently, I have moved one step closer in taking the Foreign Service Officer Test and I am starting to feel the stress mentally and see the stress on my face (or forehead). Yesterday, I printed out the rest of the study guide and I only had about 10 trivia questions to finish before that. Now, I feel like the cartoon nerd kid who was holding a stack of books at school and then another large pile of books just got dropped on top of it, out of nowhere.
I didn't mean to make this entry so depressing and I do think some things are better kept unsaid, but it is nice to know that I can let it out somewhere rather than having it eat me up inside. I'm in no way asking to be pitied.
On the bright side, I bought a pair of undies that I really liked when I first saw it but it wasn't on sale awhile back. The other day, I randomly checked Aussiebum and freaked out that it was (+ the fact that Aussiebum has everyday free shipping with no minimum), so Merry Christmas to me!
Lol, I'm so childish but it's 6 bucks! I actually don't like Aussiebum all that much because their underwear tends to bunch up into my butt crack but their Billy line doesn't do that as much. Aussiebum also seems to be the most wallet friendly when it comes to price, fit, and the selection. Would you rather get some shoddy and boring Hanes/ Fruit of the Loom briefs or something nicer like the Aussiebum Billy with a skull pattern on it?! They don't exactly hug the butt as much as I'd like, but they are nice for really hot days because they wear like speedos (heheheh).
I will probably do a video when I receive them. I HOPE I GET ANOTHER FREE PAIR OF SOCKS AGAIN!
I find taste testing videos pretty fun to watch, so I'm going to do one for next week. Not sure what I'd like to do for the week after Christmas though. I'm welcome to opinions, although no one really comments my things.
In other news, I got my birthday thing fixed with Pearson Vue for the Foreign Service Officer Test. The process was kind of weird but I'm so glad it's fixed. I'm currently in the process of filling out the eligibility forms and whatnot. I'm not just quickly filling them out and then hitting the submit button because I'm scared I'll end up with another careless mistake again. After that, I am definitely going to start cramming more seriously. I've actually taken most of their recommended school subjects during undergrad but I can't rely on memory alone. I also have a lot of math to brush up on (and I hate math to hell).
On a random note, I find that more and more people seem to use those third party programs on Instagram to garner more followers and basically if you don't follow back within 48 hours, they'll automatically unfollow you. I find that it takes the fun out of Instagram because people are so caught up with numbers than actual photos, but who am I to say when I use it to solely follow dogs and hot fitness/model dudes. On the other hand, with Tumblr, there's the onslaught of porn tumblrs and those (now defunct) fan mail spammers that continue to do their thing without being halted. Basically, if I see a straight porn tumblr, a tumblr with reblogs that are solely links, or tumblrs with a URL in the description, I just block them but whyyyyyy should I be taking care of it??? (Obviously because they're so large and there's essentially no other site like it that they don't give a flying fuck and work at their own pace, but still! USER SATISFACTION!!).
Crazy how in about 5 months, my dog will be two years old. He'll be a teenager soon...huhuhu. My dog is certainly special in the fact that he still gets super excited over the most simple things and jumps on people when he knows he shouldn't.
Thinking back to when I was doing research about what breed dog to get, I recently stumbled upon some lesser known breeds that I really like and wish I knew about them before, so that I could've maybe put them in consideration.
Well, not this one, since they're classified as giant breeds but the Leonberger is a dog I would get if I lived in a large estate and could raise a pack of dogs. That pack would definitely consist of a Leonberger, Bernese Mountain Dog, and Newfoundland, at the least! They look like a mix between a German Shepherd and a Golden Retriever.
Another dog I wish I knew about before is the Keeshond. They look like Samoyeds or American Eskimos, except not white.
I don't even really care about the energy levels of dogs anymore because I know mine is like...at the top and can't be matched. BUT YEAH! LOOK AT THEM!! lol I love dogs. and cats. animals in general.
Welp! I'm finally done with jury duty. I'm SO GLAD that I won't have to show up again on Monday. I hope the other annoyed potential jurors in my case were filtered through before the day ended but judging by how the judge and the lawyers worked, I highly doubt it.
My stupid duty fulfillment basically went like this:
Day 1: I showed up around 8 AM and prayed for there to be no cases for the day. I got called to a case 45 minutes before lunch time. After lunch, I tried to plea with the judge that I'm unemployed and I'm living off my savings, but he gave me a unsympathetic dick-ass reply, so I didn't get excused and went back outside. This was also after I told the judge that if I was to be chosen for the jury, that I would base my decision on whatever speeds up the case. I think after sitting for awhile, I realized that the votes would have to be unanimous to find anyone guilty or not guilty? Well anyway, I was lucky enough to get an early number, so I sat in the jury panel and everyone got this dumb questionnaire to fill. It was the usual crap like...occupation, the occupations of other people you live with, ever had an incident with this or that, and if you can be "impartial" to whoever was on trial. Obviously, I can't be impartial when my ass is trying to get my life together and prove to my parents that I am doing okay, so my answer to that question was, "I'm a self person and I don't care to listen to [these people's] problems when I have my own. I also think the system is flawed and easily manipulated". After filling out that paper and signing it, the judge let everyone go home for the day, so I just hurried the fuck home before traffic got heavier.
Day 2: Aside from hearing what everyone answered, when it got to my turn, the judge read that I was unemployed and a video editor. He asked me how long I was doing it and then asked me about my run in with "the law" which I brought up my uncle's DUI situation from a couple years back and if you know me, I come from a family of heavy drinkers which is why I absolutely despise drinking culture and going to bars to socialize. My uncle's an idiot and that's besides the point. I basically said it so that it would seem that I have something against the police. He then read my bitch answer from day 1 aloud but left out the "problems of my own" portion. I got a few laughs which was nice. He tried to "shake" me by asking if I say that in job interviews and I answered everything with a YES or NO. He asked me if I was lying to him or the job interview question and it's like...I'm not some idiot. I answered with "I'm not lying to anyone. They don't ask that in apps" and then I said that if I was asked whether I am a selfish person or not, I would say that I love myself and I'd do a good job because of it (which is poorly worded and stated but I couldn't think of a more "diplomatic" answer, at the time). If I took more time to think about it, it would've replied something along the lines of "I would say I'm self-confident" to counter such a dick question. After passing me over to the next juror, I sat there til almost 5 and I was SO hoping for the lawyers to decide who to excuse before the day ended so that I would be free, BUT they excused pretty much everyone else besides me. I didn't mind all that much because thinking back to it, because they excused all the women and older people first.
Day 3: I wasn't expecting to be the last one to show, but I was. We had an arrival time of 10:30 and I got to the room at around like 10:37 AM. I arrived hoping to be excused before lunch and it barely happened. I was watching the lawyers excuse who they didn't want on the jury and I'm not sure about the exact number each time, so I was going to lose my mind when it was about lunch time and I wasn't out yet. I think I was the last one excused before they let everyone out for lunch. I went to take a piss and then waited for the elevator to head back to the juror room but flocks of people started heading out too, so I took the stairs down four floors. I would then find my other peers from my case that were excused a little earlier to be standing at the window and they told me that we'd have to come back after lunch before we could go home. Annoyed, I finished up the Lunchables that I was eating for breakfast and then decided to head out to the Pie Hole by using the stairs (down another 10 floors). I though about possibly eating there if it wasn't busy and full of people, but it turned out to be exactly that.
I had been watching some other YouTube channels and noticed that some people have just been making videos off of their smartphone cameras, so I decided to give that a try with the day 2 video. My phone should be pretty capable of it since it was LG's flagship, at the time. I didn't want to hold my phone up too high since I was scared that my phone wouldn't be able to pick up my voice as well and I didn't want to make it so obvious that I was looking at myself on my phone, so the videos were recorded at the most unflattering angles. They were pretty fun to make though, so I'm thinking about doing them more. Adding a bunch of short clips together to make a video is so much faster than recording a really long one and trimming it down.
In the end, if you're trying to get out of jury duty ASAP without formal proof, I think the best method is not talking too much or giving out too much information (think Ron Swanson from Parks and Recreation) because it might work in favor of one attorney or the other. You can also give bitch answers, like me, but you might feel some retaliation and be prepared to own up to what you say. I swore to tell the truth and that WAS the truth. I hated how the judge tried to shame me and make it seem like I'm lying or tried to make me take back my words, so annoying. The question about fairness is probably the only thing that would deem you unfit besides just sitting there and not listening. I noticed that the attorneys would question some jurors on their body language. I'm not exactly sure how you would sit to show and say "this is boring as hell and I don't give a fuck" but I basically just stared at the stenographer's keyboard and laptop for a majority of the time. I also would look around the room to see how it was built because it was my first time entering a court room with a glass wall and some caging, but you could also just stare at the attorneys too. Maybe they'll notice and you stare at them til they look away. It might weird them out.
In other news, I've been studying for the FSOT (Foreign Service Officer Test) to see if I can become one. The test is actually seeming to be pretty fun but I really need to brush up on my math skills (eg. GDP growth percentage between years) and geography knowledge. I also need to get my birthday fixed on the testing website because it's off by a day but I'm going to try and do that on Monday. The test is on the first week of February but registration for it opens in a couple of weeks, so I really need to get cracking. I'm hoping to pass but I also really need to study because it might actually be my calling. It's like QUANTICO minus the gun/combat training. MEEP!!!
In my thirties. West coast. I'm so boring and dull. I don't know how else to describe myself, but this is my notebook.
My blog is about the crap that happens to me and about my days out and about (basically my diary). This blog doesn't really serve any purpose besides talking to myself and keeping memories alive. Occasionally, I post the things I purchase, what I wore, and spazz about the stuff I really like.
